I DON’T get it. I just don’t get it.

That feeling I should have – elation with QPR topping the league by a handsome margin and an intimidating goal difference.

Why am I apprehensive before each game, rather than just shrugging it off, win or lose like so many past seasons? It happens.

After the Cardiff game, that was it, I was going to come out over Christmas, get off the fence, and tell everyone we were going up – as champions. Then after the Watford and Leeds games, I went back in again.

My motivation after the Cardiff game was the manner in which we won. After Watford and Leeds, it was the manner in which we lost – impotent, the wrong side of the ball and the opponent, sloppy in defence, lacking in invention.

Then after Swansea and Coventry I’ve come out again. I’m like a figure on those weather houses, except I come out when it’s pleasant. Norwich and Bristol City were mere spots of rain that didn’t dampen my enthusiasm, and the Cup’s irrelevant.

I know you should support your team through thick and thin, and I do, and have done through the years, albeit mainly the thin. But there’s something that holds back my optimism.

And it’s not helped when commentators keep reminding me that only once in the last x zillion seasons has the team leading the league at the turn of the year failed to gain promotion as champions. This is not just any team, it’s Queens Park Rangers – the banana skin specialists – for goodness sake!

I look at the table (repeatedly), and there we are. Top,top,top,top! Our goal difference is immense and far greater than the second best.

We break the hearts of opponents with our stoic defence that denies even their best efforts. Then, when they’re totally demoralised, we give them a football demonstration, take the lead and run out deserved winners by a comfortable margin.

I know all this, so why aren’t I convinced we’ll be champions this season? I had a premonition after the first game – why do I still doubt?

Perhaps I’ll adopt a mantra, you can join in if you wish.

“I am confident that:

l QPR are the best side in the league

l We will gain promotion as

champions

l The owners will sign quality

players during the summer break

l We will consolidate our position in the Prem next season

l Neil is the manager to achieve this

l We have the squad to do it”

Oops, I’ve come out again, must mean fine weather!

Then I hear the news of poor Jamie Mackie’s injury….